a $10,000 wedding.

#687: my last post.

2009-12-14T08:15:00.000-08:00

so. what's really the best way to do this? i'm clearly not planning my wedding anymore and without any personal wedding goals, it's been tough to keep this blog going.

clearly.

i'm not very good at ending things, especially when i'm kind of like really attached. i just sulk. and think about it. and then think about it some more, knowing the inevitable, still hopeful for another outcome.

this blog has treated me kind for so long and i've been writing without pretense for a few wonderfully fun and enlightening years. can i say grateful. and super attached.

there are things i'll remember forevs. like my first post on TTO (toads clueless) and how like 500+ posts later i'd somehow become like this bonafide wedding blogger (me. bonafide. ha.)

the blogger friends out there who are some of the strongest, wittiest women i've ever met.

the loads and loads of creativity and encouragement this little world here has to offer to blogger brides.

and now i have to say goodbye? WHAT.

but this blog was about my journey, my successes and failures as i tried to plan a $10,000 wedding. and now that i've been there and done that (like 7 months ago), i don't have much to say anymore.

lame. so that said, here's the last bit.

weddings, no matter how you slice it and dice it, will tug at your heart strings and push your buttons. you're emotional because you're thinking about your families and what this shabang will mean for them, you're emotional because you're excited about the new family you're about to build, you're emotional because all of your besties are there to support you, you're emotional because there's a lot to do and you're kind of like just stressed the eff out, you're emotional because you find yourself walking that fine line between keeping everyone happy and being true to yourself...

...you're emotional because you're committing to f.o.r.e.v.e.r with that one amazing person...and want the wedding to be that kind of perfect...

it's just one day. but it's significant, you know?

so amidst the flurry, should things ever get a little hairy or overwhelming, take a step back and remember what it's all about. (hint: it's not about cake flavors or wedding dresses.)

"I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel." - maya angelou

i had to remind myself every now and then...what mattered to me, who mattered to me, and what the day itself meant to me. in the end, not everything made sense to everyone, but it absolutely made sense to me, to my husband, and to our loved ones.

and on the day of, we were fortunate enough to experience tender love, true joy, and hours of uninhibited dancing.

so this is me, wishing all of you the same and more during planning and on your wedding day.

and in life.

ok?

photo by max.

it's been real.

xo

#686: the food.

2009-11-30T21:38:00.000-08:00

i've had my share of BAD wedding food. but i've had more good than bad. really. so i guess the stigma of 'ew-inducing wedding food'...is no longer? i don't know.

anyways, when we were planning our wedding, the hubs and i were like "no. matter. what. we have to have good food, ok?"

good food for le bodies.

and our venue delivered. gosh. the food. it was just so good. especially after a few very portion-controlled weeks.

and of course we knew it would be. dude, i'm a VIP member. not joking. (it's free to join.)

photos by max.

p.s. shout out to my beautiful friends d & j who got married over the weekend. one of my fave moments of the night was when the officiant told the groom "she chose YOU...out of 3 BILLION MEN..." it was perfect.

p.p.s. had a little chatsky with dave of temple of groom.

p.p.p.s. i really do love weddings, i think.

#685: he said.

2009-11-15T23:17:00.001-08:00

photo by max.

"I love you because you believe in me. You've always done nothing but encourage me in anything that I do. With you by my side, I see no end to our success, happiness and love. You're my #1 fan and constant companion.

I never want to be without you."

#684: my life.

2009-11-08T18:41:00.000-08:00

i woke up on tuesday morning and found this little note stuck to my phone.

the hubs was up at 4am to go on a business trip to sf for the day and thought to leave me a note while i was fast asleep.

he loves me.

and he's kind of funny, i think.

#683: doesn't take much.

2009-11-01T19:24:00.000-08:00

photo by raya carlisle via oncewed.

#682: worth it.

2009-11-01T19:13:00.000-08:00

found this dazzler via craft my bride.

#681: balloon.

2009-10-31T16:53:00.000-07:00

the bridemaids took balloons down the aisle for this pretty wedding.

photo by michele waite via 100 layer cake.

brillz.

#680: the paper crafties.

2009-10-27T21:12:00.001-07:00

i love crafting.

but i'm not the type who can REALLY craft. i mean. i love the people who can REALLY craft. like, the serious crafters out there who can REALLY create REALLY amazing stuff.

but i'm not one of those.

i'm more of a... wannabe crafter. you know. the kind of crafter that gets an a for effort.

that kind of thing.

but i guess i didn't care. because we still ended up with sort of a paper craft extravaganza...thing.

our card box and our programs:

uh huh. that's right. paper baggies for the pompoms:

our centerpieces:

part of our placecard table:

here are our placecards, appropriately blurrily photographed by a friend:

(remember way back when when they were just frosh? sigh.)

most of them ended up finding cozy homes as such (photographed by a friend):

the paper experience worked for us because...well, i love paper. and i love to craft. craft-extraordinaire-WANNABE i may be, but those jitters came second to just doing something i really enjoyed doing...so that the end result would be a personal, connected, and meaningful one.

which it was.

and that's the a's and z's of it, yo. simple, huh.

all photos by max wanger unless i said it wasn't.

#679: a framer.

2009-10-26T21:45:00.000-07:00

the latest. by max.

#678: all of it.

2009-10-26T21:28:00.001-07:00

photo by steep street via once wed.

the hair. the green. the glasses.

yes.

#677: not for me.

2009-10-21T18:54:00.000-07:00

but maybe for you?

$348.75 stella mccartney (o.g. $1,395) via the outnet.

#676: the flowers. and kismet.

2009-10-20T21:11:00.000-07:00

we used real flowers for only a few things: my bouquet, the bms' bouquets, 3 orchid bouts for our moms and my grandmother, and two flower bundles to present to the parents.

total cost: $50.

so very nice.

my plan all along had been to stop by the whole foods behind my house the night before the wedding and just buy the flowers they had available there.

but a couple of weeks before the wedding, i found out that the flower mart was literally two blocks from where i worked. i always knew it was close, but having never been, i had no idea it was THAT close. so i walked myself over during lunch one day to check it out and promptly scrapped the whole foods idea. it'd be so silly to go retail when the wholesale route was staring at me in the face.

the day before the wedding, the hubs and i went to the mart to select and purchase our wedding flowers. and we had 1.5 hours to do it.

i didn't have any colors in mind or the names of the types of flowers i wanted to use for our bouquets. and no pictures of inspiration with me. instead, i was hoping really really hard to be inspired by whatever was there that day. (flexibility is cool like that.)

we weren't walking around for more than a few minutes when i came to a place that had an assortment of peonies. light pink peonies, bright pink peonies, and lavender-pink peonies. they were all blooming differently and i thought they were amazing looking. so i began to look through the bunches to pick the best ones. of course.

when all of a sudden, the owner was like "hey!"

turns out, the shop owner was my dad's friend. someone i hadn't seen in over ten years. i was like WHAT?! and he wouldn't take more than $50 from us for the 10 bunches or so that we bought. and then he threw in 3 orchid bouts for the moms and grandma for free. i was like WHAT?! but there was no saying no. and so we graciously said thank you and left the flower mart feeling uberly lucky and happy.

sometimes, when it's meant to be, it's just meant to be i guess.

the bouquets look pretty homemade, huh. my bms and i wrapped them up the night before the wedding with flower tape and some ribbon i had laying around at home. i will never know how florists make the bottom of bouquets so perfectly round and lavishly thick. mine was far from round. and way far from thick.

see what i mean? the bottom was all jaggedy and triangular.

but i don't know. i still loved the way our bouquets looked. the light pink color matched my bms' dresses quite well (my sister, the MOH, in the jeweled green/blue above. one of my bridesmaids in coral below.) and, well, i wore white, so anything would've worked. but the slightly darker lavender pink color was nice.

oh, and then here's one of the two bundles i made with the bright pink peonies for our parents. wrapped with a cut up ralph's paper shopping bag.

all pinks. all peonies. all DIY.

who knew.

all photos by max wanger. some given an extra crop by me.

#675: my hair. and the piece.

2009-10-19T22:16:00.000-07:00

i never had a hair trial and so i never knew what my hair was actually going to look like on the day of our wedding. it's probably because i knew i was going to be doing my own hair and makeup and could never be bothered to do a hair trial...for myself. dunno why. maybe, something to do with like laziness or something?

sans a hair trial, i carried a color copy of my inspiration to the bathroom on the morning of and...just wung it.

first, i blow-dried my hair and set in the same curlers i've been using since 10th grade.

then, while the curlers were doing their thing, i did my own makeup. complete with lovely fake eyelashes. they were looooooooooooooong and lovely and made me feel a little crazy and slightly glamorous.

and THEN, when the curlers cooled, i took 'em out and threw a million bobby pins at my sister who then pinned and pinned. whilst she pinned, i stared. at the gigantic fake eyelashes that were glued yay close to my eyes.

and then we all had a joyous hairspraying party to ensure my hairs wouldn't become loose.

and of course. the headpiece. well, you all know the story behind that.

i don't have any professional pictures of myself getting ready but here are some pics of the result. none from the front -- because i'm shy.

there's really no lesson here. just pretty pictures. but if anything, i hope this inspires those of you who are getting your hair and makeup done only because you think you HAVE to as opposed to NEEDING to. to give it a second thought.

for me, DIY was 110% the right decision.

all photos by max wanger.

#674: our cake topper.

2009-10-14T20:34:00.000-07:00

we didn't really have a cake topper. in fact, we didn't really have a cake. remember?

anyways, i thought that was that. done and done. but then something happened.

a couple of weeks before the wedding, we received one of our most favoritist wedding gifts, from a dear dear dear (three times, dear!) friend of mine who lives in ireland. she couldn't make it to our wedding and instead sent over something that squeezed the juice from my eyeballs.

i knew there had to be a place for it somewhere in our wedding. and it took me all of 2 seconds to figure it out.

on the day of, i had one of my bridesmaids put my friend's gift next to our cake. as a kind of cake topper. but the kind of cake topper that didn't go on top of the cake.

like this.

photo of our cake and 'cake topper' by max wanger.

p.s. it's wanger. not wagner. just sayin.

p.p.s. our venue ended up providing the cake table, a cake knife, a cake server, and cake stand...with no instruction from me. cool, huh.

#673: bits and pieces.

2009-10-12T20:15:00.001-07:00

it's been almost five months and the nitty gritty details are starting to escape me. oops. i should have written down all of my feelings, reviews, and other stuffs as soon as it was over...or even a month after it all happened...but. i'm not that diligent. and it got busy.

but it's all good. because our photog caught all the details that needed to be captured.

plus, you know, i will forever remember what i need to remember.

us. by max.

so i've been thinking about how to go about recapping. and i've decided i'm just going to wing it.

peace.

p.s. totally don't fit into my wedding dress anymore. nope.

#672: well hello.

2009-10-09T21:34:00.000-07:00

guess who got wedding pictures today.

guess who's going to be doing recaps and fulfill other bloggerish obligations.

guess who has almost forgotten how to write html codes.

photo of us...by the ridiculously talented max wanger.

#671: rock hard.

2009-09-01T12:16:00.000-07:00

i saw this wedding via east side bride and flipped. i hadn't felt the feeling in a while. you can see the rest of the photos here.

photos by christine chang.

#670: 3 months.

2009-08-28T14:49:00.000-07:00

hi. it's been 3 months since we said our i do's.

i can't say that it's been non stop bliss because the reality of everything else that's been going on. the wedding high lasts for...oh, not long enough before the real world is back in your lap.

but. i will say that it's been pretty fabulous having a husband. nothing's really changed in any obvious sort of way. and i suspect it won't.

it's a good thing.

***************************************************

in the meantime, dear meg got married. hearts.

#669: ok FINE.

2009-07-17T16:49:00.000-07:00

hi.

first, everyone is owed a happy friday. because it's friday and therefore it is happy.

second, i'm sorry if you've been checking up on TTO only to find zero updates. i didn't think anyone cared enough to actually get upset about it...but i could see how it could be annoying.

third, so i guess i owe you an explanation.

first, work has been f*ing crazy. more so than ever. so i haven't had time to roam the blogs. i do check them once in a while but then everything i see is 'old news' by the time i want to talk about it. so.

second, i'm in the midst of finishing out my current job and looking for a new job. so i'm busy hunting, interviewing, and hoping to get hired. and the truth of the matter is, this blog doesn't feed me.

third, most of my spare time has been spent helping my parents with their house. their place got DEstroyed a few months back when a pipe broke while they were out of town. everything was gutted and had to be redone...and they are just now finally settling back in. it's been sad and it's been stressful...but we're almost done.

fourth, i want to do wedding recaps (and will do wedding recaps) but i don't have my pictures yet and i want to wait until i get them.

in conclusion, i guess this is me formally announcing that i won't be blogging for a while. until my current situation lets up a bit. i'll post every now and then if i have something mindblowing to share.

'til the next episode, loves.

TTO

#668: ridic.

2009-07-15T20:47:00.000-07:00

i've been MIA. just cuz.

but anyhoo. this made me swoon today.

see the rest of max's work here.

idk. stirred up a bit of the mommyhood trapped inside me i guess.

#667: two.

2009-07-01T21:31:00.000-07:00

my best friend has two kids.

her 30th is coming up.

by albeit via oh joy!.

i think a no. 2 necklace would be lovely on her.

#666: pie.

2009-07-01T21:02:00.001-07:00

six hundred and sixty six posts. wow.

anyways.

i did some messing around on excel and created this thing. it's our expense pie.

the reception (food and drinks) for 130 guests took up 63% of our total expenditures. i wonder if that's average or not. i looked through wedding budget calculators and most of them allocate 45-50% for food and drinks.

can't say i'm not glad our budget leaned heavy towards good food and imbibementals. mm hm.

how much of your total are you allocating to the reception?

#665: trimmed?

2009-07-01T09:31:00.000-07:00

i saw this list on diy bride yesterday and wondered if we did any of these.

let's see.

Food and Drinks
1. Serve a signature drink, such as a punch or favorite cocktail, instead of providing a full bar and limit other alcoholic beverages to wine and beer, choices that will satisfy most of your guests.

we didn't do this. but we did put a cap on the host bar so we had semi-control over the expense. at one point, the events lady came over and told us we had reached the cap and did we want to increase it by x-amount. we said yes. and by we, i mean my now-husband. who was by the bar. with his friends. being congratulatory. ok? no regrets.

2. Have your caterer use local fruits and vegetables that are in season. Not only will these items be more economical, they’ll taste fresher.

we didn't do this but mainly because we didn't use a caterer. mmm. lawry's was yums.

3. Order a moderately priced, plainly decorated cake, and make the focal point the cake topper. Vintage bride-and-groom figurines, wedding bells, horseshoes, a basket filled with fruit, or a pair of doves (from an antiques shop or handmade) are classic symbols that can make a cake memorable.

yeah. we didn't use doves. but a friend of mine who lives in ireland and couldn't make it to the wedding sent us a lovely wooden figurine of a couple dancing as a wedding gift. we placed the figurine next to our itty bitty wedding cake in lieu of a cake topper. it worked for us.

Flowers and Decorations
4. While most popular bridal flowers are available year-round, some traditional ones — peonies and lily-of-the-valley, for example — can be difficult to find and expensive out of season. Seek your florist’s advice before deciding on your flowers.

i didn't have a florist and i didn't seek any advice. but i guess peonies were in season...and i really lucked out at the flower mart. like really. i'll divulge later.

5. Use favors as seating or place cards to save a bit on stationery costs. For seating cards, write guests’ names and table numbers on strips of paper, affix them to the favors, and set in order on a table near the entrance. For place cards, put favors with names attached at guests’ places.

we didn't have favors. and i guess more importantly, no one gave a sh*t or even noticed. i think 'not having favors' maybe sounds more horrendous than it actually is. really.

General Budgeting Tips
6. When it comes to invitations – save money and the environment by choosing digital options like http://www.pingg.com for save the dates. For the wedding, you can use a more formal, printed invitation. We offer a number of gorgeous designs at pingg – http://www.pingg.com/info/designer_series?artist=martha_stewart.

we didn't do save the dates. for a wedding our size, i didn't think it was really necessary. and it wasn't.

7. Fridays and Sundays are generally less expensive than Saturdays for renting a venue.

we did a saturday lunch. same concept. ish.

8. To minimize the guest list, include your friends’ significant others but not casual dates.

we didn't even include casual friends. you know?

9. For your reception, remember that a deejay can be less costly than a live band.

we used a dj and that was a splurge for us. and not necessarily the best one. (deejay? or dj?)

10. The most important thing about a wedding is making sure it is personal and reflects you. Prioritize aspects of the wedding that are most important to you. By compromising in some areas, you can afford to splurge on others.

mmhm. do. did. done.

#664: light it up.

2009-07-01T08:57:00.000-07:00

any excuse to have a party. or to buy a house with a backyard.

so gorgeous. instructions via once wed.

#663: the coolest invitation ever.

2009-06-30T22:02:00.000-07:00

you like?

i love.

click here (or the image below) to read the entire thing.

via manolo for the brides.

#662: wow.

2009-06-30T08:50:00.001-07:00

did you see this wedding? it's quite lovely.

#661: tshirt stuff.

2009-06-27T11:43:00.001-07:00

forget tissue. use real fabric. you know. if you've got some layin' around.

instructions via something old, something new.

#660: cupcakes.

2009-06-25T22:33:00.001-07:00

i had some lovely red velvet cupcakes last night made by a baker friend. my love affair with cupcakes is still going strong.

martha stewart via oh happy day!.

#659: this could be for you.

2009-06-25T11:41:00.000-07:00

#658: don't miss it.

2009-06-24T22:31:00.001-07:00

and by it, i mean the point. natch.

#657: tips.

2009-06-23T23:17:00.000-07:00

not mine.

better.

read them through the links here.

#656: pretties.

2009-06-23T15:28:00.001-07:00

i haven't been stalking my favorite blogs lately. maybe i don't really feel like i need to anymore. or maybe i've just been too busy. idk.

but i'm going to try harder to keep on top of all of the sites i used to visit everyday twice-a-day. because inspiration is inspiration, just the same. for you, me, married, not-yet-married.

and i hope to keep that part of this blog alive, at least for as long as this blog is alive.

*************************************

here's what inspired me today during my 5-minute roam around the nets.

rachel's recap of her stay in hawaii (which is my absolute favorite place on this planet. so far.)

numbered tin can DIY instructions via 100 layer cake.

via daisy chain.

via le love.

#655: tipping point. ish.

2009-06-22T11:01:00.000-07:00

we were shooting for a 100-person guestlist and that's what we budgeted for.

but somehow, we ended up hosting 130 people.

well. i shouldn't say "somehow". you know. since we're the ones who sent out the invitations.

we invited 140-150 of our closest friends and family, from all over the place, like from all over the country and all over the world. we both hoped everyone would come, but we weren't oblivious to things like the economy and the unemployment rate and companies whittling away employee benefits, cutting things like vacation days and 401k matching, and even going so far as to issue pay decreases...et cetera.

nope. not at all oblivious to things like that.

so we didn't expect a lot of people, especially those who would have to travel long distances, to be able to make it. that's just the reality these days, unfortunately, and we expected as such.

but...and to our delight...that's not what happened. most of our friends and family made the trip. they took the time. they switched things around to make it happen.

and i'd have to say that it was an incredible blessing.

one of the most fabulous things about our wedding for me was having the most important people in my world and his world, in one place, mixing, mingling, playing. together.

there will probably never be a time when our lives will collide again in that way. ever.

and so we paid about 30% more than we anticipated for the reception because almost everyone rsvp'd yes.

is this the biggest reason we went over? yes.

regret factor: Z-E-R-O.

#654: do you believe in soulmates.

2009-06-22T10:30:00.000-07:00

my 14 year old cousin asked me that over the weekend.

i told her that i didn't believe in soulmates...and gave her some long winded answer about how every relationship you're in becomes a part of you and develops who you are and prepares you for the relationship that you end up wanting to be in forever.

*********************************

"i still believe in soulmates."

#653: and one last thing.

2009-06-19T11:11:00.000-07:00

heads up. i'll be deleting comments that are being NASTY for the sake of being nasty. because i don't care to deal with it right now. thanks.

unless your comment is also funny. then maybe i won't delete it.

#652: more boring words.

2009-06-19T10:31:00.000-07:00

first thing we did...we cut out a lot of things that didn't matter to us. it wasn't easy at first because peoples' reactions to things just scared me (what? no flower girl dresses? what? no favors? what? no hair and makeup artist? what? a lunch wedding? what?).

but through the great counsel of the blog community, i got over it and became a cutting machine. not only did it save us money, but when we decided to do or not do something...it was because it did or did not matter to us.

even better.

here's a short list of things that got axed: a hotel venue. hair and makeup artist.
bathroom goodies. out-of-town bags. real flower centerpieces. favors. a big guest list. an evening reception. a live band. a wedding planner. a wedding cake.

we were unconventional, to say the least.

and along those lines, and perhaps most important of all, i started this blog. before i was even engaged. i mean, who does that? (me.)

and...our bottom line was hugely affected by this blog...and the generosity of vendors who found me through TTO. if it hasn't been obvious, let me make it obvious. by saying it again. and giving it its own line. and bolding it.

our bottom line was hugely affected by this blog...and the generosity of vendors who found me through TTO.

we also happened to run into plain dumb luck. things that worked incredibly in our favor, had absolutely nothing to do with this blog, but just really was something like stars aligning. or something.

so. now that i've said all those things (i guess i had a lot to say), i'll be jumping into the details. i don't really have any advice (except that you should start a blog).

but i've got stories. stories like spending $50 on 7 peonies bouquets and 4 orchid bouts. (it's the truth.) and i'll be doling them out in bits, through this blog and through opb (other people's blogs).

***********************************

who you are and what's important to you, your approach and reaction to things, how much time you have, where and when and how and why, who you know and what you do...every single variable that affects your bottom line, what you even consider to be part of your bottom line...

...will be different from mine.

there's no one obvious answer. i don't have a formula. it's a journey. and your journey will not be like mine.

but. if what you're curious about is whether i think a $10,000 wedding in LA is possible...after doing this for 2 years and knowing what i know...

my answer is a yes. but it's a yes with many resounding disclaimers.

in one of my posts, i talked about something i learned kind of late in the game. which is -- you can't have a $50,000 wedding with $10,000. you just can't.

if someone throws a $10,000 wedding for 50 people, who has the right to say "but that's not REALLY a $10,000 wedding because i need to have a $10,000 wedding for 200 people".

??

that said, i hope some of the things i share from this point on help you along your way. it's the best i can do.

#651: the list.

2009-06-19T09:49:00.001-07:00

people include/don't include different things in their bottom line.

here's what we decided to include in our final wedding tally:

•130 guests •DJ •Officiant •Photographer •Invitations + stampage •Wedding dress + alterations •Headpiece •Bridesmaids dresses •Bridesmaids Gifts •Hair and makeup •Groomsmen ties •Groomsmen gifts •Centerpieces •Boutonnieres (7 total) •Michaels stuff – paper, sand, jars, fake flowers, headbands, baskets, pompoms, glue dots, guestbook, flower tape, base for place cards, sticks •Polaroid film for the guestbook •Real flowers (7 bouquets, 4 corsages)•Programs •Place cards •Rehearsal lunch

#650: words are boring.

2009-06-19T08:34:00.000-07:00

this blog is in serious need of some pictures. srsly.

ok. so i've done some mulling and i've made a decision. because that's what i do. make decisions. and if you're down with what i've decided, that's great. if you're not, i can't help you. but hopefully you're down. but if you're not, like i said, i can't help you.

but hopefully you are.

so. the question from the very beginning was...could we throw a $10,000 wedding.

and...

...

...we didn't.

but.

we came pretty close. yes, we went over, but not by much.

turns out, all of the research and planning, experimenting and testing...oh, and blogging...really paid off in the end. literally.

we're so...can't even find the right word...satisfied(??) with our final tally.

and do want to know the best feeling ever?

it's taking a look at the bottom line, and thinking...sh*t. we did it right. we rock.

and isn't that really the point.

that's all i'm going to say about that.

*EDIT: and by saying "that's all i'm going to say about that", i mean i will not be posting a GRAND TOTAL. and that i'm moving on from this topic.

#649: my real life.

2009-06-18T09:53:00.000-07:00

i hate those movies without endings. and yeah, if i were you, i'd want to know how much i spent and how i spent it.

i asked the hubs if he thought he'd want to know if he didn't already know and he said..."uh. duh."

$10,000 isn't chump change but it sure is a dreamy budget for a real wedding, eh. not for all, but for most. so i get it. i get you.

i'm not embarassed i went over (not anymore, anyways) and i don't think you'd judge me for it. i've had one or two comments thrown my way to the effect of something like "i'm going to stop reading this blog because you are obviously going over $10,000 which means you are lying to us and you are not staying true to the cause..." (errr, ok?...)

but they're obviously no longer reading so...

...and this blog has been blessed with extremely supportive readership. my wedding clearly wasn't run of the mill but most of the things i chose to do were fully supported through TTO. because you GET indie. you GET setting a budget that is within your means and then some. you GET refusing to be WIC-ified unless you want to be. you GET it. plus, i don't KNOW-you-know-you. so i'm not scared to share personal information with you.

but in real life, i get scared. i'm a really reeeeeeally private person. like annoyingly private. like i have walls and things all around me. and there are like 3 people inside those walls with me. and the rest will forever just be scratching the surface.

...i'm one of those.

we can get psycho-analytic about my past with friendships and trust and things like that...but that's not the point. point is. i get nervous when people i know know too much about me.

which is why i've chosen to remain anonymous until now. which is why i still haven't told any of my friends about this blog. which is why even though i think they might already know about this blog, i don't ever bring it up. and which is why they probably don't bring it up with me. which is why i hope you can appreciate that it was a really reeeeeeeally big deal to show you my faaaaace. sure, you would've eventually perhaps figured it out. but dude. i actually led you there, remember?

and then now, to divulge something personal like 'how much i spent on my wedding' to not just you, but potentially to people i know...is a huge step for me. not saying i won't do it. but i'm just saying, ok?

anyways. maybe you get where i'm coming from. maybe you don't. either way, i know you're curious.

so as i mull it over and figure out the best way for us to meet in the middle, here's what you should do before all else should you have goals and intentions that mirror mine.

start a blog.

**********************************

i'm not joking.

(p.s. i'll explain more later. for now, i have to get back to work.)

#648: well?

2009-06-17T13:25:00.000-07:00

i'd promised honesty during the blog's early days... but now that i'm no longer anonymous, i'm getting quite shy about sharing the specifics.

a reader sent me this email, which was kind of lovely to read actually, considering the things i've been considering.

so i'm sharing it with you. so read it and let me know how you feel. i'm considering this an informal poll, of sorts.

hi there. you don't know me, but because i have been following your blog for so long, i feel like i know you. and because of that imbalance, it seems foolish for me to request something from you... but i'm going to anyway. i thought about commenting my request, but since i've never commented, and because i wanted to make sure that it got to you, i'm emailing. so without any further [creepy] ado...

please don't tell us how much you spent. it doesn't matter. it just doesn't. the whole journey of discovery and revelation [culminating with your pictures, oh! your pictures...] became more than a monetary goal. so much more. we don't need all the answers.

we all have the same goal, really - to capture, for ourselves, the memories of pure happiness that you've captured for yourself. so, no matter the name of your blog, or what you started out aiming for, you are successful.

like i said, you don't know me, so i won't be at all offended if you don't indulge my request. just putting it out there.

congratulations and best wishes always.

#647: did you know.

2009-06-14T21:13:00.000-07:00

that even when the wedding's over, the to-do list is still alive and kickin.

we have registry gifts we have to return (dupes and the like) and we have yet to even begin writing our thank you cards. but at least we have the thank you cards.

i love gocco.

oh, and should i be worried about our marriage license? we mailed our stuff in at the end of may...and the check hasn't cleared and we haven't seen anything yet. does it usually take this long? don't know about these things, see.

#646: thank you.

2009-06-10T09:18:00.000-07:00

hey you. a million thanks for being so nice to me.

i feel like i've bared my SOUL by exposing my face but...it's not like you don't know how my soul works anyways. eh?

and also, many thanks to max, who, by making us clowns look so soft...and me, the consummate non-dainty, look downright wispy at times...gave me the courage to show you us.

**************************************

the day went by quickly...but i remember every moment.

like, i remember when we were up at the altar. when i was looking into his eyes. when i was thinking, he's kinda cute...i wonder if he thinks i look pretty today...wow.. i'm getting married... stop crying..get it together (to myself).

i also remember the words we said to each other. how he promised to take me shopping (no really. he did. "i will...take you shopping". that's what he said.) how he said he would always provide a safe place. how i said i would always listen. the jokes we laughed at...

when we stood in the back of the room and watched the slideshow my sister labored over for like a million hours. our first dance. our second dance. (we like to dance.) our first bite of prime rib (heaven). the toasts. slicin' up our itty bitty cake. when his mom and i cut the rug with our awesome dance moves. seeing all of our guests, most of them from out of town, together in one room. hugging each person.

i'm normally not as attentive (ask anyone who knows me)...to anything -- but i really was on that day. i WAS a sponge. i soaked it all in.

**************************************

i was really really happy.

#645: hi.

2009-06-08T19:37:00.000-07:00

so.

um.

nice to meet you.

<3,
tto

#644: dude.

2009-06-08T13:31:00.000-07:00

so now that the big elephant question has been answered, could i push the dinero talk aside for a bit and just 'gurge about stuff? (like you have a choice.)

random thoughts:

1) you haven't seen my face yet. and i don't know if i want you to. there's something kind of freeing about running around this blog world anonymously. it's like, i can do anything i want, say whatever i want, care about myself and only myself. (you should try it sometime. it's fun.)

but indubitably, people (and by "people", i mean "people i know and who know me") will figure it out...even if i don't show my actual noggin. not because i'm popular (i only have like 150 friends on facebook. and yes, isn't that how you measure popularity these days?) but because. the world is small. los angeles is smaller. and the blog community (of which some of my friends are active participants) is even smaller than that.

fact: one of my friends found this blog and asked if it was me. really. srsly. to which i had to of course say "yes. but tell anyone about it and i'll cut you."

i didn't really say that.

2) there are a lot of things that went wrong at our wedding. i will share these with you first so we could boohaha together and get the boohaha-ing out of the way. oh, and also because i am a pessimist-slash-skeptic and this is what pessimist-slash-skeptics do: point out the bad stuff.

*the officiant left out a significant part of the program which caused some confusion when we were announced as husband and wife which then confused the guests who only caught on that the ceremony was over when we were already halfway down the aisle.

*the djs played a lot of the songs i had carefully taken off the song list and didn't play a lot of the songs i had added to the list.

*we only made the rounds to half of our guests during the reception because we were pulled away midway for the toasts...for which we had to wait for the best man anyways for 10 minutes afterwards because he was waiting for his wife. this happens to be my biggest regret of the entire day. we should have just continued making the rounds until the best man was really ready because by the time the toasts were over (and the father-daughter / mother-son dances immediately followed afterwards), most of the guests were either on the dance floor with us or were milling around the bar or were leaving. we didn't get group pictures with the rest of the tables.

*i had to whisper loudly to my sister after her speech to remind her to announce the father-daughter dance (she was distracted by this thing called emotion)...which she announced...and then whisper loudly again to remind her to also introduce the mother-son dance which was happening at the same time.

and...those are the ones i remember.

3) re: the mishaps --> on the day of, i only gave a sh*t for like half a second. i gave myself a quick talking to when these things happened so i wouldn't get too upset. quite proud of myself. if i do say so. myself.

oh cher...'if i could turn back time...' -- but i can't. so.

4) i danced. a lot. at times, i think i might have even been dancing by myself. clearly, i wasn't really paying attention, and clearly, i just really wanted to dance. so i did. whether there were 2 people on the dance floor (as in me and a person who just happened to be standing nearby) or 30 people on the dance floor, i danced. with 'em all. 'twas joyous.

5) dana got married. lady-blogger-friend is a gem...with positivity oozing out of her. she has been uber supportive during my sulkier times and following her journey has been equally as uplifting. wishing her and hunter the BESTEST EVER.

6) i kind of missed you guys while i was busy honeymooning. in a way only a rather obsessive blogger ever could.

7) so i'm married now. it's different but same.

i never said this post would have a point.

#643: the bottom line.

2009-06-07T22:08:00.000-07:00

so...was i able to pull off our wedding for $10,000?

the answer is no. and no, i'm not going to 'surprise' you later and say we spent less. because we didn't. we spent more. to be clear.

********************************************

more on this to come.

#642: so. like.

2009-05-24T13:43:00.000-07:00

we laughed.
we danced.
we cried.
we hugged.
we grubbed.
we drank.

we married.

#641: stuff i'm delegating.

2009-05-18T14:50:00.000-07:00

what i've chosen to delegate isn't necessarily what you will delegate. but i'll share anyways.

because you ask. and i answer. (about 10% of the time. sorry.)

1) rehearsal lunch picnic: cousin and her friend will be doing the set up at the park, pick up of the food, keeping the drinks ice cold, etc.

2) picking up my dress: mom.

3) lugging of the centerpieces to the venue: thanks dad.

4) lugging of the placecards (and the stand and the tree that decorates it) to the venue: bridesmaid.

5) slideshow: sister.

6) setting up of the sand bottles for the sand ceremony on day of: bridesmaid.

7) guestbook table and polaroid picture taking and program passing outting on day of: 4 cousins.

8) putting boutonnieres on the gents on day of: bridesmaid.

9) checking the set up of the centerpieces on day of: bridesmaid.

10) keeping me focused on happiness: to-be-husband.

plus, the DJ and the site coordinator have the ceremony and reception schedules broken down to the minute along with the seating arrangements and music selections. not going to think about it anymore. if it happens the way we planned, great. if not, then that's the way it goes, yo.

#640: advice.

2009-05-15T09:24:00.000-07:00

i'm not really qualified to impart any advice.

but let me do so anyways.

****************************************

a lot of brides have told me that the week before the wedding is CRAZY NUTS INSANE CRAZY and CRAZY. they just want it to BE OVER...like COME AND GO already. have i used enough CAPS to EMphasize my WOrds.

i've heard it so often since even before i got engaged...that i actually did the unthinkable, peeps.

i didn't procrastinate.

i gathered. i prepared. i gameplanned. i action-listed. i delegated. i coordinated. (uh, this blog? hello?)

and...

...i'm now at the point where i will be totally and completely letting go of all reigns to let the people who have stuff to do, actually do what they're supposed to do.

it's not like i'm not going to have stuff to do or figure out or finish. but i don't think i'm going to WIG OUT right before the wedding worrying about all the details (and there are a LOT of details to figure out. no really. a lot.)...because i've taken care of everything beforehand.

and certainly, when the wedding day arrives, i'm not going to sweat the minutia. i'm not going to have an ounce of concern. i'm going to cruise. i mean. this isn't natural, of course. it'll take effort on my part to not want to oversee every little thing on the day of...but i will work hard to keep those things out of my mind. other than that, my biggest 'job' will be reminding myself to be in the moment, to take in as much as i can, to smile and hug and touch up any smeared makeup.

that's it.

ANYWAYS. so. i guess my advice here is two-fold.

1) don't procrastinate.
2) don't forget to enjoy yourself during the planning process.
2.5) ...and on the day of.

me personally? i think #2 is harder. it's easy to get really wrapped up in the stress, anxiety, and the CONTROL part of planning...and unbeknownst to yourself, letting that become your entire experience. there were times when i had to check myself...and looking back, i'm so glad i did. because i've never once thought -- "i want it to be over already" or "planning sucks" or etc. it's been a joyride for the most part, ladies. and i guess i'm saying what i'm saying because i wish the same upon you.

...and with my own wedding date getting closer and closer, it almost feels like the beginning of the end for this blog, doesn't it?

i don't know.

have a great weekend. xoxo.
tto

#639: open letter. ish.

2009-05-14T09:57:00.000-07:00

hi stephanie.

can we be twins? pretty please?

because i'm diggin' the do you posted. like way.

many thanks.
tto

#638: he's busy.

2009-05-14T09:41:00.000-07:00

and just so talented, that max.

#637: daddy.

2009-05-13T19:51:00.001-07:00

after fretting for hours and hours...we finally found the song for the father-daughter and mother-son dance portion of the reception.

it's the song. perfect for us.

don't care what anybody says.*

"love will keep us alive" -- eagles

photo by the wonderfully talented team over at one love photo.

*i mean, i care, of course. but i'm just sayin.

#636: red nails.

2009-05-13T19:21:00.001-07:00

my nails are short. so i think i could fly with poppy red nails. but i'm nervous they might be kind of "too much" against all the WHITE i'll be sporting on the day of.

you? are you going neutral or planning to flash some colorific?

anyone go either way and regret it?

(let's keep toes out of this and talk about fingernails only. toes have a lot less visibility. sorry toes.)

#635: ellie's back.

2009-05-12T11:06:00.000-07:00

congrats ellie!

via mint.

*************************************

you know she's going to share lots of visual goodness. first up, her invitations. are you as inspired? can't wait to see what's next.

#634: off the list.

2009-05-12T10:57:00.000-07:00

on a brighter note, finished as of this weekend and yesterday:

*seating chart
*cardbox
*programs

yippee.

#632: it's like. art.

2009-05-08T17:00:00.000-07:00

photo by...
who else...
max...

#631: stuff.

2009-05-08T08:39:00.000-07:00

hi again.

i've been wanting to share these pictures with you. because i think they're nice.

but before i do, let me just say that after a small meltdown earlier this week, i feel like i'm in a good place. in other words, i've got my sh*t together. for now.

big sigh of relief.

i'd also like to add -- that i wouldn't be even close to this sane without my little sister. she's been cc'd on every email i've been blasting out for the past few weeks re: for crafts, for the rehearsal lunch, for the guestbook table, for meetings, for ideas, for a song she's going to sing during the ceremony, for the slideshow she's putting together for our entrance, for drams. everything. she only just turned 25 (our little baby!) but she's been my friggin' anchor. go figure. she's done things unprompted like clearing her schedule for this entire month so that she could be available to help me with any and all things.

i mean. srsly? i'm not even close to being as thoughtful.

and to put things into perspective, let's just say she's the kind of person who has 1000+ friends on facebook. uh, not in a weird way but in a she's-a-major-social-butterfly way. do you know what i'm saying here.

anyways.

point being. there isn't quite anything like a sister and i'm so stankin' happy to have mine. she's not my friend...she's my sister.

it's different.

here's a shot of our placecards and a closeup of the centerpieces. my bridesmaids and i spent a saturday and sunday (read: 8+ hours) cutting, folding, gluing, horsing, hurting (glue gun = scary).

#630: our vows.

2009-05-07T09:31:00.000-07:00

awwwww shiz. break out the kleenex yo.

i know i'm going to lose it when we say our vows to each other. we (as in I) decided to use the format sara and matt used. except we're cutting out the "because i love you ____________" bit.

so basically, we're going to each state 5 "i love you because ___________"s.

we finally finished them last night and i like them. we're clearly not trying to impress anyone with our wit or sentiment (you know. because we both have both in spades.) and i'm actually surprised neither of us went the overly-sentimental-gag-me or haha-so-funny-but-not-really route.

our words to each other are exactly that. words. words to describe what is normally very hard to put into words.

my favorite line from his vows: i never want to be without you.

i'm thinking of responding: suckaaaaaa.

#629: the cake.

2009-05-06T17:29:00.000-07:00

hi guys. say hello to our cake. (i mean. i haven't ordered it yet. but i plan to this week. unless i change my mind.)

it will be a 6-incher from sweet lady jane. and FYI, a 6-incher serves 6-8 people.

WHAT, you say? WILL THAT BE ENOUGH, you say?

thing is, my venue has a dessert course option that's included in the cost. so i'm opting to serve the house chocolate cake with vanilla bean ice cream.

what that means is. i will not be paying for a separate so-called wedding cake. yay. well, i'm paying for the 6-incher...but that's it. it's almost like a prop. something to cut. because we want to cut a cake.

word.

p.s. i have two hangnails on my left thumb. one on the right and one on the left. eh.

#628: "so, is it getting crazy?"

2009-05-04T14:06:00.000-07:00

in a word, yes.

until now, i think i've been pretty zen about the whole thing. but we've entered the final stretch and i find myself running through about 10 different lists/ schedules/ charts in my head at any given moment.

so yes. it's crazy.

the main may to-do's:
*seating chart
*finish placecards
*vows

hm. doesn't seem too bad. but there are a lot of other little things. logistics. delegation. decisions.

btw. i know this blog has been uber self-absorbed for, oh, like forever, and then even more so for the past few months. but.

gotta get get. ok?

love you.

#627: my dress doesn't fit.

2009-05-04T08:48:00.000-07:00

so. like i had my second fitting yesterday.

and my dress was tight. not the 'that's TIGHT' as in 'that's AWESOME'. more like 'that's tight [on you]' as in 'it barely zips up'.

great.

but not all is lost. it has motivated me to get my act together and put the extra poundage in check. i was going to start a 30-day running stint a few weeks ago but after 2 days, i had gotten way sick and ended up being out of commission for almost 2 weeks. i'm 98% now so i will start running again tomorrow morning.

but running alone won't help me. so i plan to change my diet. as in...no more fried foods, no more junk food, no more eating a full meal at 10pm and falling asleep at 10:10pm. all things i enjoy but can no longer afford to do at this point.

hopefully all things combined, in a few weeks, i will be a happy, healthy bride who can still breathe with her wedding dress on.

and yes, when i bought the dress, it fit perfectly.

#626: the dance.

2009-04-30T15:16:00.000-07:00

we will be having a father/daughter + mother/son dance. together. at the same time. because that's how we do.

i can't decide on a song. actually, it's not that i can't decide on a song. it's more like...i haven't found the song. i've pored through lists and lists, looked through you tube, googled and googled, asked my friends and family. and nothing.

what's your song?

#625: aNOTHER contest.

2009-04-30T10:45:00.000-07:00

but this one's a good one.

read more about it here.

hint:

photo by feather love photography.

mmhm.

#624: the makeup.

2009-04-30T10:21:00.000-07:00

so these are the products that made the cut:
1) diorshow waterproof mascara.
2) urban decay eyeshadows.
3) make up forever eyelashes.
4) smashbox primer in light.

what i've learned.
1) makeup is damn expensive.
2) makeup is way fun to play with. but it takes time to apply. me = lazy.
3) but still. i should wear makeup more often. because it's fun.
4) there's a lot of stuff out there. it's like, crazy.
5) i toads need to practice before the wedding.

#623: the timeline.

2009-04-29T10:47:00.000-07:00

10:45am - ceremony begins.
11:30am - ceremony ends.
11:35am - cocktails + hors d'oeuvres hour.
12:15pm - slide show / our entrance / first dance.
12:30pm - lunch is served.
1:30pm - the toasts.
1:45pm - father daughter / mother son dance.
2:00pm - cake cutting / dessert is served.

this is the meat of it. no pun intended. heh.

#622: hi!

2009-04-29T09:46:00.000-07:00

i know i've been toads MIA lately. it's a number of things. first, i don't know what to talk about. second, i was REALLY really sick for over a week and i'm still recovering (mom is convinced i have swine flu). third, the wedding is in less than a month so maybe i'm a little stressed out and don't want to blog about wedding stuff because i'm inundated with wedding stuff every single minute of the day? idk.

we're going to another wedding this weekend. hopefully we find time to write our vows at some point. heh.

oh. and there's another project i want to take on.

the polaroid guest book. except it won't be a free-for-all-take-as-many-pictures-as-you'd-like kind of thing. polaroid film = expensive. so i think i'm going to station 3 of my cousins at the front and have them take pictures of the guests as they arrive.

then again, i may not want to have another project on my plate.

then again, it'd be really cool to have a polaroid guest book.

#621: done.

2009-04-27T09:34:00.001-07:00

centerpieces: check.
placecards: check.
boutennieres: check.
flowergirls' headpieces: check.

#620: twenty dollars.

2009-04-22T19:20:00.000-07:00

that's how much alllll the materials cost. i'm making 5 real bouts plus several other bouts-y type things.

twenty dollars.

holler.

#619: i've been sick.

2009-04-22T12:34:00.000-07:00

so sad. it's 90 degrees here in la and i've had a fever for the past 4 days. boo hoo.

but i'm feeling much better now. so you can expect more bloggage from me. first up, here's the dress that had me feeling the dress envy.

so. gorge.

oh, and if you're wondering why the quality of my pictures is always so terrible, it's because i take pictures with his blackberry. for the convenience of being able to email them to myself right away. so i can post them on this blog. so i have something to do. when i'm not doing wedding stuff. for my wedding.

#618: it's like i'm cheating.

2009-04-20T14:12:00.001-07:00

because this isn't really anything other than a re-post.

but it's not like anyone minds, right?

a wedding by max wanger.

#617: too kitschschty.

2009-04-17T12:31:00.001-07:00

you know what i mean.

so this was the original concept of our placecards. you know. because we're having our wedding at a restaurant known for their..*ahem*..prime rib.

but as i kept going with it, i came to my senses. so. no more cow cut-outs. (i hear sighs of relief everywhere i think.)

and now we have a new concept. concept 2.0. i'll post about it on monday since i don't have a prototype yet. heh.

p.s. i really like cereal box stock. re-using is cool.

#616: clearly.

2009-04-16T13:57:00.000-07:00

lovely images perk me up. do they perk you up.

first, hello emilia jane's engagement pics.

photos by the equally moniker-blessed photog noa of feather love.

and then second, these friggin' garlands. clearly, i haven't thought about garlands in a while and i wasn't going to even start thinking about thinking about them again. but now i'm thinking.

via oh happy day.

p.s. thanks for the heads up on these beauts, lazy bride. i think.

#615: i'm vowing.

2009-04-16T08:55:00.000-07:00

on this blog (because. i don't do something unless i say i'm going to do it. on this blog.)

i'm going to run at least 3 miles, every single day. for 30 days straight.

30 days. of running.

not joking.

that's all.

#614: dress envy.

2009-04-15T08:57:00.000-07:00

i went to a wedding this weekend. and among other bits of fabulosity, the dress the bride wore was just stunning.

it was literally perfect.

i've never really lusted after a wedding gown before. well, not like this, anyways. a wedding dress is a wedding dress. is a wedding dress. a strapless is a strapless. is a strapless. i don't hate it. but i don't love it. and that's how i've always felt. like on a scale of ambivalence for wedding dresses, i tipped heavy to the "very ambivalent" side.

ergo my own spontaneous dress purchase months and months ago, a month or so into our engagement. i bought it (marked down 50%! wow! must buy now!), felt a few but not TOO many pangs of regret (mostly due to the price tag even after the 'marked down 50%!' thing), and haven't really looked back since.

because...i'm ambivalent.

but after seeing my friend's wedding dress this weekend, i'm having second thoughts. thing is. her wedding gown was made by one of her (extreeeeeemely) talented bridesmaids. it fit her perfectly, both in size and personality. i know it's not good to envy...but then again, oftentimes, that's how we're challenged to action, right?

not sure what i'm planning to do, really. but i might do something.

p.s. and we're less than 2 months out. good times.

#613: won't stop.

2009-04-13T13:18:00.001-07:00

a wedding by max wanger. that's right. a wedding.

i mean, don't get me wrong. his engagement photos are ridic(ulously good). but these are the first wedding shots i've seen from him in a while. so i'm a little bit up in a happy tizzy.

p.s. oh. and in case you're wondering whether i will be sharing every single shoot he posts with you, the answer to that is...probably. as in yes. i will not stop doing so. thank you.

#612: will it keep.

2009-04-13T13:09:00.001-07:00

diy instructions at once wed.

would this baby's breath garland keep if i made it ahead of time and kept it out of water for like 12 hours?

just askin.

#611: hip hop at noon.

2009-04-13T10:09:00.000-07:00

we hired a dj.

it was a TOUGH decision, let me tell you. i went back and forth on it a million times. to dj or not to dj. to spend the money or not to spend the money. and fiance was unmoved either way.

can i also add that negotiating with djs isn't easy? the djs i contacted didn't move much on their price and even with a lot of back and forthing, they all ended up hovering around the same price range.

and by same, i mean out of my price range.

eventually, i contacted a friend of a friend who used to promote at clubs and now books gigs and manages 2 of her dj friends. i had done my homework and found that other friends who've used them had really liked what they did. so i asked how much they would charge for what i needed...and found that they were around that same 'out of my price range' price range.

i negotiated to the best of my freaking ability and was able to knock off a bit. and looking back, i think i could have been an even stronger negotiator. but it was tricky because she was a friend of a friend.

during negotiations, she promised no hidden fees, no extra charges, the rate was inclusive of all travel and equipment handling fees...and tips. plus, no upfront deposits - just payment in full after a job well done. and she also offered to step up and semi-coordinate the day while 2 djs manned the music.

AND because she's a friend of a friend, i trust her.

trust = key.

so. after all that, it felt kind of right and we bit the bullet. the more i think about it, the more i think it was the right choice for us.

i didn't even feel right delegating someone to light candles around the room, let alone man an ipod for a few hours.

although, now that she's acting as a semi-coordinator, i suppose i could ask her to light the candles.

anyways.

so getting to the 'hip hop at noon' thing. we're having a lunch reception. and our venue is not outdoors...it's a restaurant. and it's mostly family. given those things, i just really don't think people will feel like dancing. i've never been to a daytime wedding so i don't know.

as i discuss the playlist with the djs, should i assume people won't want to get down so early in the day and keep the music on the mellow side? or should i not assume anything?

#610: whole foods.

2009-04-13T08:51:00.000-07:00

i was over at whole foods on friday, picking up a fruit tart and a wheat-free/flourless chocolate cake and briefly stopped to admire the flowers by the entrance.

i'm DIY'ing my bouquet, see, so i notice these things.

now. ideally. i know i should head over to the flower mart where they have a million flowers on the cheap. but 1) i don't have time and 2) i don't want to stress over it days before the wedding and 3) i don't want to stress.

i think i would try harder to save bucks on the florals if i was building my own centerpieces and needed a LOT of flowers. i'd probably also care what would be available to me and i'd probably even go so far as to order in advance the flowers i really want to use.

but the truth of the matter is, i don't because i'm not. my centerpieces are paper, remember. and the bouts are not going to have anything live in 'em.

so. i need real flowers for my bouquet. and the bms' bouquets.

that's it.

and my bouquet will not be one of those lush, thick, 10 pounders, i can tell you that much. and the bms' bouquets will probably be itty bitty. heh.

anyways. the point of the story is that i'm going to go to the local whole foods on the friday before my wedding because 1) it's right behind my house, literally, 2) they have a great selection and 3) it'll keep me sane yo.

happy monday.

#609: clearly.

2009-04-07T08:55:00.000-07:00

i've fallen off the blogging wagon.

but that's ok. right? i've got no mojo for it right now. dunno why.

anyways. have you seen the latest? gaw.

by max wanger.

#608: pretty.

2009-04-03T14:54:00.000-07:00

instructions via once wed.

since i'm making my own bouquet, i'm hoping wherever i go the night before our wedding to buy the flowers has these exact colors and species available.

and if not, that's ok too.

#607: a list.

2009-04-03T14:36:00.000-07:00

this is one of those 'thinking out loud' posts. so.

do you do better with lists? i do. and i haven't had one in a while. i guess i've been carrying around a muddled one in my head. but i haven't sat down and really gotten dirty with it. i think i might have been skirting the fact that i need to get stuff done. with the invitations out of the way, i've been kind of like in 'i deserve to rest' mode. still kind of am. plus. there have been other dramsies. anyhoo.

so the rsvps have been trickling in. and before the inbox gets all crazy, i need to have a system. do you do better with a system in place? i do. so, this weekend, i plan to start cutting up our placecards. the idea is to write down each of the yes answers as they come in. srsly.

i also need to go to michaels to pick up $5 flowers.

APRIL:
complete centerpieces
practice hair/makeup
decoration for ceremony
hairpiece for the flowergirls
wedding rings
seating chart
order rehearsal lunch
write vows / ode to parents
cake - make a friggin decision

doesn't seem too bad. i think.

#606: in the hair.

2009-04-01T09:01:00.001-07:00

via a desert fete.

i plan to make two. one for each of my flower girls.

#605: i'm not gonna do...

2009-03-30T10:42:00.000-07:00

...what you all think i'm going to do. just because i have less than 2 months left.

*************************************

part of today will be spent doing some homeworkage. i'm going to study this post and all of the subsequent links shared in the comments.

i want our vows to be simple, strong, heartfelt. but not cheesy, dramatic, 'trying too hard'.

best of luck to us.

#604: win it.

2009-03-27T10:42:00.000-07:00

need a little something charmy?

or just think this rebecca wynne bracelet would be gorge in silver?

enter a contest to win it. details at happy hour bride.

#603: 30 reasons.

2009-03-27T09:23:00.000-07:00

what do you get the guy who wants for nothing.

i have been struggling. his 30th came and went and i had no clue what to get him. i know. bad me. i mean. we celebrated his 30th. but the 'gift' has been IOU for 2 weeks now because i haven't been able to come up with something that would satisfy my inner gifter. whatever i get, i want him to be like 'i want to be 30 again next year.' and perhaps jerk a tear? maybe from laughing so hard? maybe from the sentiment? something like that. and i haven't been able to think of anything that would even remotely have that kind of effect. a watch? golf lessons? scotch? shoes? next.

but.

now i have a plan. i'm going to make a list. a list like this (via a practical wedding). and i'm going to have it printed as a small poster or something. and then frame it for him. so he can have it to look at for always and forever.

because really. who wouldn't like to know 30 ways in which he is absolutely loved and adored.

*****************************************

so. could you suggest any etsy'ers who would be able to create this type of thingamajiggy for me? you know my style right?

much appreciated.

#602: shoot.

2009-03-26T09:50:00.000-07:00

i'm already in the middle of constructing my centerpieces. and i've repeatedly said i don't want to use candles.

but dang.

i need to host a party of some kind so i have an excuse to create these lovelies.

complete instructions over at once wed.

p.s. i said dang. what.

#601: watercolors.

2009-03-26T09:13:00.000-07:00

via courtney khail stationery.

so very very pretty, no?

she's hosting a contest over at design crush for a set of stationery. so go take a gander and maybe you'll win.

or maybe i'll win.

i think if i were to win it. i wouldn't send them out, but frame each one for different rooms in my house. and by house, i mean 1-bedroom apartment.

#600: a & d.

2009-03-25T10:09:00.000-07:00

image via etsy seller irenesuchocki (thanks em.)

********************************************

have you ever seen that movie. muriel's wedding. not saying i'm muriel.

********************************************

i think it's about time i say some nice things about people. and by people, i mean my girlfriends a & d.

a & d are not in my bridal party. but they're kind of awesome. gal pals who protect my very difficult heart and even more difficult mind. it's a tough job. but they do it. and have done it for almost a decade.

sadly, after college, Life never had plans to let the 3 of us to live within 3000 miles of each other. but we've managed to get together at least once every 1-2 years. either in LA or in new england or some random destination in europe.

anyways, all this just to tell you that a & d just booked their trips and are coming to the wedding.

and that i'm so happy, i could almost burst.

me. burst. imagine.

#599: words.

2009-03-24T11:15:00.000-07:00

i haven't really written anything worth reading these days. or ever.

but meg has. and then esb made me laugh.

and then LPC noted i never use caps. and then i couldn't stop reading her blog.

that's all.

#598: soap giveaway.

2009-03-24T09:34:00.000-07:00

via 100 layer cake.

so the ladies of 100 layer cake are hosting a giveaway. a giveaway of yummy soaps that they handmade. or, is it homemade? anyways, the criteria is to leave them a comment describing something unique you're doing or did with your bridesmaids. and then you get the soaps if you win. and then you can gift them to your girlsies.

sadly. i tried to leave a comment but got stuck. because i don't feel like anything i've done has been...'unique'. so. i'm hoping to be inspired by the comments you leave. you know. to get some cool ideas. heh.

so go. leave a comment. maybe win some soaps.

#597: oh for "love & lace".

2009-03-23T11:03:00.000-07:00

i was inspired in a major way today by stephanie of love & lace. who i'm starting to feel is kind of most definitely my crafty kindred spirit.

so. i will be constructing a teeny poof of fun color for the guys' bouts. can't wait to get my hands on the goods. that's what she said.

and yes. etsy is addicting. like way.

from etsy seller seven arrows shoppe.

both from etsy seller little vintage violet.

from etsy seller book nook creations.

#596: done.

2009-03-23T09:21:00.000-07:00

inspired by ellie, i gocco'd our envelopes with a little squiggly something.

they're addressed, stamped, and will be entering the big blue bin later this morning.

i wonder what peoples' reactions will be when they receive them. or if there will be a reaction at all. i wonder.

#595: new etsy crush.

2009-03-20T12:23:00.000-07:00

etsy seller design whimsy via something old, something new.

and with that, i bid you adieu. have a wonderful weekend.

xoxo,
tto

p.s. i had pasta last night and today, i'm way bloated.
note to self: don't have pasta the night before the wedding. thanks.

#594: peek it.

2009-03-20T10:53:00.000-07:00

they're pretty much done. ready to go out on monday.

guess who's happy about it.

me.

other things to do this weekend:
*DIY a bouquet. just for fun.
*sleep.

#593: they sure don't.

2009-03-20T10:47:00.000-07:00

he looked so groomy with the ivory tie and white shirt.

kind of made me want to jump him.

#592: heh.

2009-03-19T12:42:00.001-07:00

so i've been trying to build a website.

i tried wedding channel.
i tried blogger.
i tried wordpress.
i tried ewedding.
i tried momentville.

and we, as in i, decided to stick with mywedding.

#591: no reason.

2009-03-19T11:31:00.001-07:00

there is NO REASON for me to want to spend money. on a dress, especially. except, that i want to.

by sarahseven.

#590: gadgetry.

2009-03-19T09:39:00.000-07:00

i'm not a fan of gadgets. i have one of those free phones from verizon and even though the fiance keeps bugging me to upgrade to a bberry, i. will. not. because all i need are the basics.

and it's not often that i see something gadget-y and want. it.

but i saw this on 2000 dollar wedding today and kind of wanted to reach into my computer screen and start taking pictures with my free verizon phone.

polaroid pogo.

digital? instant? what? so cool.

p.s. i dig how she gathered photos from her guests.

#589: i chuckled.

2009-03-18T16:58:00.000-07:00

from i can read via i could be ordinary.

#588: translucent paper.

2009-03-18T14:57:00.000-07:00

i picked up a few sheets at michaels last night. i'm still stuck as to what i'm going to do with them. if anything.

in the meantime, my projects for tonight (i'm trying my best to knock things off our list and stay sane by taking it one day at a time) include:
1) address the rest of the envelopes and
2) gocco our return address.

anyways, i saw this today and thought these few words would make a sweet addition to any invitation. or programs. or a wedding website.

via a cup of jo.

#587: distract thyself.

2009-03-18T08:57:00.000-07:00

via bridetide.